|
|
AN EXCERPT FROM JARVIS CLUTCH: SOCIAL SPY
By Dr. Mel Levine and Jarvis Clutch
1. Don't be too fake by trying to be too cool. Make sure you are not wasting your time and your energy trying to be someone you're not just so you can have a herd of admiring fans (instead of real friends).
2. Know all about social cognition and how it works. Learn the words for the things you need to do (like code switching and conflict resolution). These words help you think about what you're doing in the dangerous, wonderful social universe.
3. Talk to other kids about social cognition. Don't just take it all for granted.
4. Try to be a part of groups that are not all alike. Find groups that encourage or at least allow kids to be different from each other instead of forcing them all to be the same.
5. Respect kids who are different or odd; there's a very good chance you'll be working for them some day. Being a little weird is good (I hope).
6. Find an adult you can talk to and trust with social questions and problems you have.
7. Don't bully, make fun of, torture, or create misery for another kid because he or she isn't fitting in. Don't make fun of people for things they can't help (like problems with social cognition). It's OK to have some teasing, but it's not OK to cause major embarrassment (Levine calls that humiliation). That's just pure, plain, total complete cruelty to humans.
8. Ask yourself whether you are paying too much to be popular. I don't mean money. Is your popularity affecting your grades, your future, your family life, your real self, or something else important that could hurt you badly later on?
9. If you have a weakness in your social cognition, get help with it. Don't just ignore it or think that it will go away by itself. Ask your sociable local doctor or someone at your school where or how you can find some help.
10. If you know a kid who is not fitting in but would like to, help that kid. That's what I call being a real hero (or heroine).
Read the book:
Jarvis Clutch - Social Spy
|
|
|